Book Review: Alien:River of Pain.

Alien River of Pain is for me the final insult in a series of unadulterated fan wank like novels....if they were written buy fans who never watched the movies. Sloppy writing and shoe horning like your trying to fit a square block  into a saxophone. Christ this book is bad on so many levels.

Christopher Golden story centers around the fall of the colony Lv-426....cool, cool only got to see a bit of that in the Dark horse comic Newts tale and the faith of the Marine Unit stationed there!...Wait what?
What fucking marine unit. There was no mention of marine unit at the Colony. Did it slip Bruke or Gormans mind to mention it and get this there was also a research vessel there which with to escape. Right so heres the big issues with this added plot point.

• If there was marines on LV-426 already how come the Marine squad sent there didnt seem to know anything about it. Hicks or Aphone were never like maybe we could check to see if any of the jarheads stationed there are alive. For that matter how come when the got stranded and are low on ammo they never go "hay lets check the unit that was stationed here's barracks for more Pulse-rifle ammo and weapons. 
• Frost states that most of the damage done to the colony was small arms fire and explosives used for mining not USCM weaponery which these guys seemed to have.
• The Hero Captain Brackett manages to escape with some of the colonists and while the story states he's trying to avoid contacting Wayland-Yutani the jerk never bothered to send out a transmission saying "yeah the planets fucked....dont risk your lives trying to save people cause their dead and you will be two if you land there!"
• Agien when shit hit the fan with the dropship gone and the reactor going to blow how come no one bothered to check the colony logs to see...holy shit theres a ship stationed here. Fuck it I know it was gone at this stage but surely some one might have gone...yeah the colony might have a ship maybe we should double check.
• They told Ripley that it might be nothing only a downed transmitter then why send more fucking marines if you had ones there already....sure those ones had their own communications unit. You could argue Bruke knew what went done but still wouldnt Wayland-Yuntani want keep the USCM outta its shit as much as possible.

Also the story has this fucking god aweful subplot involving Newts moms relationship with this Marine Captain Brackett which hits ever so slightly he might be Newts real father. Golden also gets lazey and pulls segements straight from the movie but not just Aliens but Alien also...and word for word....thats not writing thats dictating a fucking script to a novel. Then agien I should have seen how bad this books was when the slogan was The prequal story of the Doomed Colony Hardlys Hope from the blockbuster movie Alien!. 
They couldnt even get the fucking movie right. Sweet christ this book is indeed a river of pain and a lake of shit. I rather get facehugged then have to read another one of these fucking books agien.  Aviod this book like the smallpox.

Book Review: The Alien Archive

I recently purchased a tomb of Alien info called the Alien Archive. This books covers all four movies and is a wealth of Alien concept art used and unused, set photos, insider info and interviews.
The opening chapter is an interview with Sigourney Weaver on how working on these movies and playing Ripley had a prefound effect on her life.
Later sections show case the amazing work of Ron Cobb and Syd Mead and their wonderful concpets for Alien and Aliens.
You get a look at the unused idea's for Vincent Ward's Bosch like wooden planet and idea for what the Runner alien may have looked like. Hell even the Alien Resurrection stuff is wicked to look at. The concept art and design was wicked.
The down side is there very little written about the movies but a whole lot of wicked photos and art work do make up the bulk of this beast. Good thing or bad thing.....I'll leave that up to you.

Not lying this book was steep setting me back €45 but if your an hardcore Alien fan like myself you should own a copy of this book.

Book Review: Alien Sea of Sorrows.

Well after reading Alien out of the Shadows I didnt think an Alien story could get much worse. Well....I was right. Sea of Sorrows isnt as bad as Out of the Shadows but still isnt without its issues.

((Spoilers Ahead))

 While James A. Moore is a way better writer and story teller then Lebbon he suffer from an dreadful case of shoehorning element from the Alien movie franchise namely the character of Alan Decker.....the descendant of Amanda and Ellen Ripley. 

This is a savage push at best. He does have around about way of explaining it.....along with the resurgence of Wayland-Yutani. Keep in mind this book is set 300 years after Alien Resurrection which makes it set a further 200 after Alien3. That would suggest that Wayland-Yutani had been biding their time for 500 years. Now while I and many fans hated the idea of the W-Y been bought out buy fucking "Wallmart" of all things the fact Moore decided to do it to please the fans or hassle from Fox in doing the book just felt so forced.

He also brings back atmosphere processors and The Colonial Marines who use pulse Rifles in some parts(yet another lost fan fave) This makes no sense to bring back an out dated army is one thing but bring back tech thats 500 years old in this books time line makes no sense. Its like us using steampower and flintlocks today.....its just kinda silly. Even when he does do fan service he gets it wrong like stating the Auriga crashed in France which was the case.....in the uncut edition of Alien Resurrection the transport ship the Betty with Ripley and Call landed in Paris France not the Auriga crashing into country. He does get some other minor things wrong and only if your a hardcore fan like myself would you notice.

That said Moore is a very good writer with both characters and tension both top notch. Alan Decker if you can look past his backround is a likeable guy along with some of the mercs. The latter part of the books is Decker blackmailed buy W-Y into joining some mercenaries in a misson to capture a live xenomorph on the same planet from Tim Lebbons book. Moore also does a great job of getting inside the Xeno hive mind and hunting pattern with reminded me of the Alien Resurrection movie novel but done a lot better here.

At the end of the day there just too many issues with James A. Moores Sea of Sorrow to ignore. Is it an shit Alien novel?....No. Its failing like Out of the Shadows it try's to connect its self two closely Alien movies. If you were to read S.D Perry's fantastic Aliens Dark Horse adaption novels they were their own stories that only every once and awhile referenced the movies but for the most part did do their own thing. Be it pressure from Fox or too eager to please fan boys Moore blew off his own foot with the ham fisted fan service which is a sham cause he really is a fantastic writer. If your a die hard fan pick it up but be prepared to pick it apart too.

On a funny side note Sea of Sorrows is the 2nd in a trilogy which as I mentioned is set 500 years after Alien while the next River of Pain is set in that Aliens time line which leaves me baffled on how their going to connect those books.

 

Book Review:Alien Out of the Shadows

I'm a big fan of Steve Perry's novels based on the Dark Horse run of Aliens and collected a number of the books in both the Alien, Predator and AVP formats. However once Perry stopped writing the novels I ignored the newer titles Like Steel egg and Forever Midnight. Over the years I've given graphic novels precedent over novel...not altogether but enough to know I should try and get back into reading paperbacks.
So I decided to treat myself to reading Tim Lebbon's new alien novel. This was a mistake indeed.

((Spoilers ahead))

The story takes place 37 years after Alien and 20 years before Aliens. The crew of the mining vessel Marion came face to face with a xenomorph infestation and are knocked into a decaying orbit. Salvation come in the form of wait for it.....Ellen Ripley. Yes Ripley had another encounter with the fucking bugs. People may bitch about Hicks in Aliens Colonial Marines but you know what he made sense in that story.....this story is fucking aweful. Turns out Ash downloaded his A.I in the the Narcissus craft and intercepted the Marions S.O.S wanting another chance to bag a live xeno. The crew come up with one of the most batshit plan ever thought up ((acid guns on the Aliens anyone!)) and most end up as bug chow or being melt or impregnated. They find another Alien Queen and kill it. In the battle Ripley's injured and while being healed begs for her memories to be wiped. Hence why this event is never brought up at gate way. So the writer for continuity turned Ripley into C3PO at the end of Revenge of the Sith. Hooper the only likable and developed character in the story is left marooned in a dropship and no mention of this has ever poped up in the Aliens universe expanded or otherwise.

This books is a waste of time and money. Theres some good idea's but they'v already been done (Call put her A.I into the Auriga in Resurrection) Chis Hooper a good character but he has nothing to work with. Lebbon does do a good vision of how aweful space really is but he cant write action, cant write suspense and sure as shit cant write an Alien novel.

Do yourself a favor. Pick up one of the reprints of the Steve Perry books or even the Alan Dean Foster movie novels but give this book a wide fucking birth. Theres two more in this series buy different writers but if this is the quality of those books Ill be taking my own advice.